Admissions Open to The Rape Academy
Posted by aniche on April 25, 2008
The Rape Academy of India (RAI), in coalition with its brother branch, the Indian Institute of Molestation (IIM), invites applications for Diploma Courses in Rape and Molestation, Sodomy and Murder, and also a 3 month certificate course in Hypocrisy. Applicants are requested to forcibly collect a pair of white panties from the assaulted body of a strange helpless girl and affix on it, using fresh semen, three attested copies of passport size nude photos of the helpless girl’s pubis and sent it to the address given below:
To,
Mr. Horny Man,
The Rape Academy of India,
Any street,
Any city,
Any where,
All the time- 247365
About The Rape Academy of India
The Rape Academy of India is an autonomous rape institution recognized by the Government of India. It comprises the Indian Institute of Molestation (IIM) and the Centre for Sodomy (CFS), two institutions highly regarded for their major contributions in the fields of physical harm and sexual violation of women. The Rape Academy of India is a professional rape centre which offers a variety of services in forced sex and assault of women and young girls. It is also the only institution in India that does not follow the regressive idea of affirmative action and gives an equal chance to rapists from all walks of life based purely on the merit of their raping.
Courses
1) Diploma in Rape and Molestation: The R&M Course is a full time, post-graduate diploma programme. It aims at giving young and aspiring rapists a professional outlook on the highly competitive field of harming women. The Rape Academy arms the young dicks with the expertise and skills needed to break into the pussy of unsuspecting bitches and smoothly leave the scene without getting caught. Students will also be educated on the history of rape, some of the great names in the field of rape, and also the latest innovations that has made itself inevitable in the arena of rape. Many renowned politicians, police officers, and various media personnel will visit the Rape Academy from time to time and conduct various rape workshops and educational seminars on pussy-bashing.
Electives: Amputee rape, Relative Rape, Date Rape, Moving Car Rape, Preteen Rape, and Gang Rape.
Eligibility: Anyone with a dick can apply.
Career Opportunities: Unemployed bum, Horny Loner, BPO Cab Driver, Pervert Neighbor, Lecherous Servant, Police Officer, Politician, Bollywood, Tourist Guide, Shack Owner, Teacher, etc.
2) Diploma in Sodomy and Murder: The S&M Course is a specific course meant for students that are strictly into ass ramming. It is designed to give a thorough knowledge in the field of ass raping and the subsequent slaughter of the victim. There is a strong emphasis on student performance evaluation through projects and practical assignments and on research work by the students themselves. The first semester provides a comprehensive perspective of asshole ripping and butt cumming; the second semester is project-based with hands-on production and execution to provide knowledge that is essential in the field of sodomy and murder. Highly esteemed members of several rape organizations like the ‘Blow Job Pirates’ and the ‘Salacious Indians Violating SExy North Americans’ visit the Academy to give lectures and narrate dick raising stories of real sodomy and murder.
Electives: Tourist Sodomy, Roadside Sodomy, Public Sodomy, Workspace Sodomy, Backseat Sodomy, Dead body Sodomy, Bludgeoning, Stabbing, and Drowning to Death after Sodomy.
Eligibility: Anyone with a dick or a sharp object can apply.
Career Opportunities: Member of the Parliament, Government Official, Minister’s Son, Bollywood, Political Kingpins etc.
3) Certificate Course in Hypocrisy: A three month short-term course in saying one thing and doing another. Students will be taught to engage in several hypocritical activities like salivating after and secretly harassing secretaries and interns while publicly denouncing women who dress in anything other than a ten-layered sari and a full-sleeved blouse. Students will also be given training in lying through their teeth and acting like a complete shameless retarded motherfucker. They will also be given training to appear on news channels and compare cheerleaders to bargirls while jacking off on the side leering at the reporter’s cleavage.
Motto of the Rape Academy: An unraped bitch is a terrible thing to waste.
Some Useful links
http://www.ibnlive.com/news/mentally-challenged-girl-raped-culprit-absconding/63236-3.html
http://www.ibnlive.com/news/another-minor-raped-in-delhi-police-tightlipped/63291-3.html
http://www.ibnlive.com/news/constable-friend-held-for-raping-minor-in-delhi/63914-3.html
Abhiroop said
Aniche – Master of stunningly caustic satire
hsinava said
well,i like the career opportunities on the second one!
Fook Moi said
no email id mentioned. now how to contact them!
yaake said
Even though this post may be the typical Aniche Hell-may-care satirical roller coaster, I think this is a serious issue that needs to be addressed in our country! It’s disgusting the way women are treated and the way the number of rape/molestation cases are on the rise! I think something should be done…
chunque said
Awesome blog! I’m puttin’ you on mah blogroll!
duffboy said
This rape academy you mention could have branches here in Guatemala, where rapists walk out the prisons and perform their career majors with no problems at all.
Peter Parkour said
Sad state of affairs you have there.
Sam said
Cuttingly Caustic! Fantastic post.. hits right where it hurts the most! U r the KING!!!
Vijay said
A serious issue brought out really well.. Excellent post !!!
Ervin Sholpnick said
I see you and I are the only two people on the planet that can use the phrase “Gang Rape” as a tag and not actually be a porn site.
I think that is a good thing.
But why do I feel dirty inside.
Oh, here is the reason… I had an old bologna a cheese sandwich in my pocket.
Did I say good post by the way? If I didn’t, I was thinking it the whole time I was typing this comment.
Anshul said
WTF, We want minimum 70% reservation for OBC,ST,SC in both these institutes + 100% reservations in all prospective careers and also relaxations of 5% for people without sticks or sharp objects who do not understand satire.
Also, it would be appreciable if some forest land could be alloted for opening up of more branches of RAI Foundation and IIMs.
Do you know of any scholarship schemes ?
Anshul said
@Duffboy, Those rapists would be lecturers here.
Rex said
Blow Job Pirates (BJP) and Salacious Indians Violating SExy North Americans (SIVSENA)!! LMAO
chaitanya said
hey
i think you forgot to mention about the faculty staff, pls do mention them so that the students get more confidence in pursuing the degree
fruitymind said
‘A three month short-term course in saying one thing and doing another. Students will be taught to engage in several hypocritical activities like salivating after and secretly harassing secretaries and interns while publicly denouncing women who dress in anything other than a ten-layered sari and a full-sleeved blouse.’
Tremendously captured. Pretty acidic post. Hits it when its hot! I am your biggest fan! How do you write such stuff man…..I want to rather join your insitituion…..
Poonam Sharma said
hey, that’s quite apt, hard-hitting satire.
gijew said
I took the “not for credit” community course through the RAI called “How to Cuddle When the GHB Twitch Kicks In”. It was very informative I should say.
Karthik said
This is an amazing blog. I am sure Raj Thakeray is the Principal for the IIM as he was very supportive of his students who were on a LIVE PROJECT on unsuspecting innocent girls coming from a New Year party.
What you have put in very true. You are the KING OF SATIRE.
doremi said
Word.
Neha said
bad mind creation !!
Shame on India
Anonymous said
very well-written. gives the same feeling of helplessness.
Anonymous said
this article is as a slap on the face of youth of this country,my sympathy to the writter i know it is not to bring down our image but it remains the fact,high time for my youth friends of country to fight against it,we r not like this,we have lots of good things to offer the world,we r competative
brilliant and masterminds behind everything world has created yet the above blog is not wrong,so lets not wait for the bllody politicians and the system to act lets start thinking ourself abt it
hsinava said
nothing yet on the IPL?
sanjukta said
I read it, not saying anything that you don’t already know.